Should Schools Teach Emotional Regulation as a Core Skill?
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Schools teach us how to solve equations, analyze literature, and understand history. But there’s one essential life skill that most classrooms overlook: how to manage emotions. We learn how to pass exams, but not how to calm ourselves during stress. We learn how to debate ideas, but not how to handle conflict or disappointment. Emotional regulation, the ability to understand and manage your feelings, isn’t just a “soft skill.” It’s one of the most important tools for success, both inside and outside of school. In a world where anxiety, burnout, and social pressure are rising among students, teaching emotional regulation should no longer be optional. It should be part of the core curriculum.
What Emotional Regulation Really Means
Emotional regulation doesn’t mean ignoring or suppressing your emotions. It means recognizing what you feel, understanding why you feel it, and choosing how to respond in a healthy way. For example, instead of reacting impulsively when you’re frustrated, emotional regulation allows you to pause, take a breath, and respond thoughtfully. It’s the skill that helps you stay calm during exams, manage group work stress, and recover from failure without breaking down. According to research from the American Psychological Association, emotional regulation is linked to better focus, stronger relationships, and improved academic performance. Students who can manage emotions also show greater resilience and empathy, qualities that lead to long-term success.
Why Schools Avoid the Topic
So why don’t most schools teach emotional regulation directly? The reason is simple: traditional education systems have always prioritized academic achievement over emotional well-being. Subjects like math and science are easier to measure. You can grade a test or mark a paper, but you can’t easily score emotional intelligence. That makes it harder to fit into a standardized curriculum. Another reason is that many adults assume emotional skills should be learned at home. But not every student grows up in an environment where those skills are taught or modeled. For some, school might be the only consistent place where they can learn how to cope with stress healthily. Ignoring emotional education leaves students to figure out mental health and self-regulation on their own, often through trial and error. That’s not just unfair, it’s risky.
The Cost of Ignoring Emotional Skills
When emotional regulation isn’t taught, the consequences show up everywhere: rising anxiety rates, school conflicts, and burnout. According to a 2024 report by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), nearly 42% of students said they felt persistently sad or hopeless during the school year. Many struggle to balance academic pressure, social media, and personal expectations without knowing how to manage emotional stress. Without emotional coping tools, students often turn to avoidance, like procrastination, isolation, or self-criticism. These habits can damage motivation and make learning harder. Over time, unmanaged emotions don’t just affect grades; they affect identity, confidence, and overall mental health. Schools that include emotional education, on the other hand, report lower rates of bullying, higher student engagement, and stronger school communities. The benefits extend far beyond the classroom.
The Connection Between Emotions and Learning
Emotions and learning are more connected than most people think. Neuroscience shows that emotion directly influences memory, attention, and decision-making. When students are stressed or anxious, the brain’s amygdala, the center for fear and emotion, takes over, blocking access to the prefrontal cortex, where logical thinking happens. That means when students feel overwhelmed, they literally can’t learn as effectively. On the other hand, when students feel calm and supported, their brains are more open to processing and retaining information. Emotional safety creates the foundation for academic success. So teaching emotional regulation isn’t just about kindness; it’s about helping the brain work at its full potential.
What Teaching Emotional Regulation Could Look Like
If emotional regulation became a core part of the curriculum, it wouldn’t need to replace academic subjects. It could be woven naturally into daily learning.
Here’s how it might look:
Mindful Start to the Day: Short moments of reflection or breathing exercises at the beginning of class help students center themselves.
Emotion Check-Ins: Quick discussions where students identify how they’re feeling and why, encouraging awareness and vocabulary for emotions.
Conflict Resolution Skills: Teaching students how to navigate disagreements respectfully, listen actively, and express themselves clearly.
Coping Strategies: Practical lessons on managing anxiety, setting boundaries, and asking for help when needed.
These tools not only make classrooms calmer but also prepare students for real-world challenges. Emotional skills don’t expire after graduation; they become life skills used in jobs, relationships, and leadership.
Overcoming the “Soft Skill” Stereotype
Some people argue that schools should focus only on academics and that emotional regulation is a “soft skill” that doesn’t belong in education. But calling it “soft” overlooks how powerful it really is. Think about it: What good is intelligence without emotional stability? How useful is knowledge if you can’t manage stress, handle criticism, or work with others? Emotional regulation doesn’t replace academics; it strengthens them. A student who can manage test anxiety performs better. A student who can handle feedback improves faster. A student who understands empathy builds stronger connections with peers and teachers. The real “hard skill” of the future might just be emotional control.
Examples of Success
Some schools have already started integrating emotional learning with promising results. Programs like Social and Emotional Learning (SEL) in the United States and MindUP have shown that students who receive emotional education show higher academic performance and fewer behavioral issues. In one study by CASEL (Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning), students in SEL programs scored 11% higher on standardized tests compared to those in traditional classrooms. They also reported better relationships and less emotional distress. These programs prove that emotional skills are teachable, measurable, and transformative. The question isn’t whether schools can teach emotional regulation, it’s whether they’re willing to make it a priority.
Preparing Students for the Real World
The world students are stepping into is fast, unpredictable, and emotionally demanding. From college pressures to workplace competition, success now depends as much on emotional intelligence as academic skill. Employers increasingly value traits like self-awareness, empathy, and adaptability. These aren’t just personality traits; they are skills that can be learned. Teaching emotional regulation early helps students enter adulthood with resilience instead of burnout. When schools focus only on grades, they prepare students for exams. When they teach emotional regulation, they prepare students for life.
Final Thoughts
Academic achievement is important, but it’s not the whole picture. Emotional regulation is what allows students to handle stress, recover from mistakes, and keep learning even when things get hard. If schools want to raise not just smart students but strong, compassionate human beings, they need to teach the skills that support both mind and heart. Grades fade. Knowledge changes. But the ability to manage emotions lasts a lifetime. Maybe it’s time for schools to start treating emotional regulation not as an extra subject, but as a foundation for everything else we learn.
Reference: https://www.achievepsychology.org/post/should-emotional-regulation-be-a-required-school-subject
